So sad so sad..

What a day for me!
I am home alone...
And i start to feel so lonely...
I just wanna cry out loud to release all the tensions...
I am always home alone anyway... Mother went over to bro's hse but i don't wanna join..
I am so anti-social to go n meet anymore new friends.. i don't need them...
This is the first time of being home alone that i am so so so so sad of...
Home alone is always a norm in my life actually... Life is ok without anyone...

A message from last week during the church session:
Pastor asked: Who thinks that he/she doesnt have someone that knows him/her well?

The first thought for me is definitely a --> I don't have one!
But, 2nd thought is --> i have one.

So which is the real thought?

There's something imprinted in my mind! i m so sad for that..

Again, still sad for a lot of things..

I think i m in the down part of my life again... everything seems so unwell, and not smooth..

Why whatever i want to get doesn't come into my hand? Why there's always no chance for me?

what can i do now? i hate everything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aiks.......